Wish upon a star

MOVING

2009-10-17T19:57:00.003+08:00

MOVED TO http://fallingstarsto9.livejournal.com/

2009-10-13T20:44:00.002+08:00

Writing song lyrics' cool , i tried but cos i cant play guitar or piano i cant make it into a song . Emo-ish songs are easy to write , probably cos there's many experiences .

I don't want to stay here any longer
I've tried and tried
yet got nowhere further
My tears fall silently
Wishing I could just be of help

Err , dont laugh , first try . Think its better off as a poem .

I'm sorry , to you , and to the one who i wasnt in the mood to talk to this week . Really sorry to both of you . To tell you the truth , i really dont hope that it'll stop right here , cos i dont want to lose you . I know i said something really wrong , and i'm sorry for that , cos i know i shouldnt have said that . The rest , is up to you . Amen,

2009-10-12T11:04:00.002+08:00

Your guardian angel

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

Cuz you're my, you're my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away, Please tell me you'll stay, stay
Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be ok
Though my skies are turning gray

Thank you ,
i still havent forgotten it (:
in case you dont know who you are ,
you're the person who typed me the part in RED <3

Cant break away,
cant open my heart .
Sorry,

2009-10-11T12:41:00.002+08:00

MAJOR MODULES COMING !!! die already~ trying and tring my best to pull my results up , certainly not very successful . Killed myself with chinese chengyu this week , with the umpire test( extra thing to study for -.-) yeah , been really happy this week , other than the studying. (: Kinda confusing for some stuff too , but its alright cos i know there's people there (: Oh , and to AZRAEL :D , i'm so glad that the thing that i hoped would not happen , is NOT happenning (: Think its the opposite way round eh (:

KAJIAO-ING PEOPLE IS FUN :D

The cdp thing is adding more stress to everyone , esp alin . ALIN ! dont stress okay ? i'll help you sort the stuff out ! (:

Sadded , missed out on the hari raya thingy , but ohwells . I helped me realised something too, actually . Pretty much boring yesterday , yeah .

Graduation night was great , i thought the powerpoint was really touching and stuff . Mine'll be in 3 more years . It seems pretty fast that the year is out already , and that the settling down part is done .

i still cant let go of you,

2009-09-26T22:10:00.004+08:00

You called my name, reached out your hand,
Restored my life, and I was redeemed,
The moment you entered my life,
Amazing grace, Christ gave that day,
My life was changed,
Went from my shoulders, fell the weight of my sin

So it's with everything I am,
I reach out for your hand,
The hope that changed a second chance I've gained,
On you I throw my life, casting all my fears aside,
How could greater love then this, ever possibly exist

Consume my thoughts, as I rest in you,
I'm now in love, with a Saviour,
Bearing the marks of his love

So I wait upon you now,
With my hands released to you,
Where a little faiths enough,
To see mountains lift and move,
Yeah and I wait upon you now,
Dedicated to your will,
To this love that will remain,
A love that never fails

I love this song ! It really brings out the fact that God gave to those that faded away from him a second chance to come back to Him . (: Oh , i forgot to mention in the previous post . THANK YOU VIKKI ! You really inspired me with what you said that day , during that 20 mins or so we had together . You got me up and going, to start doing something about my spiritual walk with God . You made me realise , what i'm doing now isn't enough . You gave me advice , on how i should start doing it . I cant thank you enough for all you've done for me , all you've instilled in me . Truth be told , you're the person who made me who i am now , and made me come to my senses . Together with azrael , you're the angel that God sent to me , to lead me back to him. Thank you !

AZRAEL ! :D
You're another angel sent to me (: You never failed to be what you termed as 'my soldering machine' . You know what i mean . :D Though one of your notes , you showed me i wasnt making enough effort to praise God , to worship Him . You encouraged me by telling me that God would be there to protect me , to take care of me . It really meant alot during that time , when i was really afraid .(of something small , i know , that you yourself are afraid of too) Thank you ! I've learnt alot from you , and though you , i really understood what it means to take action instead of just saying . Cos you, did just that , to really get at me. Ily !

Sorry to those who i didnt mention , i just mentioned th main two people ! There's olivia , who always tries her best to help me , to not be irritated at me , to try and hang out with me when i was alone in the past , and always tells me she's there for me when i need her ! I appreciate that too oli ! Thanks alot ! And some other people , who really made a difference in my life . Thanks to all ! (:

2009-09-24T12:07:00.002+08:00

Finally posting :)

Passing notes with az is fun . :D Very busy this whole week ! Chiong chinese hw after cf yesterday night until 12 , then as what i learned from someone during cf , started the 10-mins-a-day thingy :) Read about David and Goliath , then i saw this part about love that was interesting . Shall read on today ! :) Cf sharing started to really hit me alot this few weeks , like how it seems that God is speaking to me through vikki and chris . Hmm , shall try and become like David , although its gonna be hard i'm still gonna try . :)

Starting to finally do some things ! Learned alot this few weeks , esp this week . And i started having weird dreams . lols ! :)

Maybe its meant to be that way,

2009-09-07T16:44:00.003+08:00

Awaiting tomorrow :D

Yay , going sentosa with the rest of 6O '08 , finally get some time to catch up with each other :)
JANNELLE ! I'm gonna see you tomorrow ! haha .

I wanna go back to school , just so bored at home. I MISS MY TEAMMATES :D haha , some others too :) So fast , one year almost gone . Sigh . Must treasure everyday ! :)

Anybody can tell me some sensible quotes that are encouraging , wise or funny ? haha . I need them for something . :) Actl , two things :P

2009-09-06T21:06:00.002+08:00

ZQS chalet wasnt as fun as i expected , kinda awkward most of th time .

Suppressed memories flood ,
leaving me a taste of the past.
Just 4 words ,
and the impact just comes.

i miss the times we had together,
though i know its gone .
just pure memories,
fading as time passes .
i still long for those times,
those times where we would go,
cycling,
in the dawn.
i miss the rides,
the turns,
the long stretches where we would ride fast,
the enjoying of the sunrise.

i want those times back.
i want everything to go back in time.

i want,

2009-09-04T20:09:00.002+08:00

I LOVE THIS WEEK :D

haha , i had a really short but awesome week :D i love tuesday night ! kimmy , if you read this , shhh , but thank you ! Still trying to figure out the triangles , if you know what i mean :)

Thanks people !

Cant forget it :)

2009-09-01T14:23:00.003+08:00

Happy birthday to me :)

haha , first time so many people wish me happy birthday , kinda overwhelming . Someone ah, purposely wanna keep me in suspense , its killing me :( Finally going back school again . Yuan min ! Growing older already ! haha (: Happy birthday in advance !

Jannelle !

i really dont know how to help you, i can only listen and offer some advice when i can , and pray for you . I really dont wanna see you give up and break down , yeah ? I know it's hard, and it feels like you cant pull through . I know you're exhausted , but keep trying , okay ? Love you !

2009-08-31T21:23:00.002+08:00

Went back to tk today , sadly didnt get to see everyone cos i went back early:(
I met pei er instead ! haha , havent seen her in a lonng time , was great catching up with her :)

6 Olympism 08 reunion !

Cannot miss , cannot miss ! i really hope it doesnt fall on a saturday , if not cannot go :(
I miss the class loads. All the memories are simply unforgettable.
Jannelle ! Cheer up girl ! must jiayou okay ? i know that it isnt easy , but i'll always be there for you okay ? miss you !

2009-08-30T18:16:00.001+08:00

You are a Thinking Melancholy

Melancholy personality types are introverted. You are a faithful friend, a self-sacrificing parent, and a devoted spouse. Your weaknesses are pessimisim, skepticism, and insecurity. You get depressed easliy. Curb your tendency toward moodiness and lighten up! Don't allow a negative outlook to rob you of close relationships. Your opposite for relationships is a Sanguine, you'll compliment well.

I think its really true . haha !:)
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2009-08-30T15:39:00.002+08:00

2 days :)

Currently very bored, stress , mentally exhausted , going mad from too much thinking . haha .

Been thinking alot , and getting stressed by tests that are coming and the stupid thailand project-.-
must do TWO brochures, and i didnt even go for the last day of the cultural thing , how to write? (i'm the writer btw) Changed my mind about some things again this week , dunno why la. I cant seem to stick my mindset in one direction-.- haha :)

I dont think i can go out any longer on tues, cos i gotta do the thailand project-.- Bleh. :( must try and finish it fast man .

Goodbye , i'm afraid,

2009-08-23T18:34:00.000+08:00

Currently waiting for someone to give me what she wants to give me :D

Cf this week was damn cool , held in the field. I hope the group doesnt grow smaller ,like what sasha said . The soccer finals on friday was awesome ! really exciting with all the near misses and stuff. I must say , faizal's kick that scored the last goal was awesome :D Had fun trying to wave to mr ong from damn far .:) Lols ! Hmm, staff day's coming , gotta sew for the staff . Haha . I dont think any of us know how to sew , hope it turns out alright.

Anyone wants to go out with me on staff day ? I'm gonna ask my mum if i can go out. :D think most prob can la , haha :) Do tag if you want to !

2009-08-22T11:55:00.003+08:00

I've learnt much , from thailand and this week of school . :)

I can feel myself changing , and i must admit , after thailand , i've changed alot. The way i look at things, how i react , everything , i've changed. i'm shocked , by how i react to certain situations , by how i seem to be more stone-hearted. i must say , all that laoshi and many others who have said things, have made me want to do well , to become the me i used to me , in the attitude towards studying . I know i used to dislike my laoshi , cos of how she always was so strict . But i've come to realise through all her naggings and lectures, she has made me into a better person , someone who would work hard , and all . Others like mrs soong , noraida , vikki , have also contributed in little ways , that i must say , went a long way in changing me.

I can feel myself becoming more and more independent, no more the me who always was dependent on others . Independent : To be able to live without parents only , is not total independence. But to be able to live without BOTH parents and friends, that's true independence :)

Thank you Lord, for everything.

2009-08-17T09:24:00.003+08:00

True colour quiz( Facebook) - BLUE

Blue-

Values:Sensitivity
Harmony
Compassion
Joys:Romance
Friendships
Affection

Strengths:Nurturer
Sincere

CreativityNeeds:Understanding
Love
Affection

Frustrations:Lack of Rom...ance
Disharmony
Time Limits

At work you have a strong desire to influence others so they may lead more significant lives. You often work in the arts, communication, education, and helping professions. You are adept at motivating and interacting with othersIn love you seek harmonious relationships. You are a true romantic and believe in perfect love that lasts forever. You bring drama, warmth, and empathy to relationships. You enjoy sysmbols of romance such as flowers, candlelight, and musci an cherish the small gestures of love.In childhood you were extremely imaginative and found it difficult to fit into the structure of school life. You reacted with great sensitivity to discordance or rejection and sought recognition. You responded to encouragement.

What does your birthday say about you ? ( Facebook)

Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people's mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and co...ol. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves sports, leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.

I think some of it is really true. Try it ! :)

2009-08-14T20:52:00.000+08:00

Thailand was okay , quite fun ah. i'm too lazy to post too much .

YOG countdown was downright fun (:
Played basketball(for fun) with Emily and vikki against ngiam bin , bryan foo and ryan .
Dance, dance , run , slept like a pig .

I'm afraid noraida would be angry after she knows that i cant train for a week, the doctor gave me a letter of excuse , i wanna train , i dont wanna make noraida angry again . I dont know what to do .

2009-08-03T19:55:00.004+08:00

Today was awesome (:

Went down to katong @ 1 , met up with liz, sarah, vikki, olivia , then went to Baker's something to buy cakeeeeee (: Ended up with a chocolate one, then when the cashier asked ' How many candles do you want ?' , vik was like , '10 big ones ! ' haha, was damn funny , cos 10 big candles= 100 years old :D

Walked on to tk , then of all people to meet , we saw MR ONG . Spoiler manzxz . No more surprise :( Chiong-ed the wrapping , writing and stuff cos we saw mr ong return to school . Then he said he had science booster-.- We lighted all 10 candles paintakingly then called him out of booster . Haha ! After booster we took all the whipped cream and smeared it all over him ! Oh , not forgetting the spray :D AWESOMEEEE :D

Ms Poh picture ! :D

its hard ,

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2009-08-03T11:49:00.002+08:00

Thailand in 19 hours (:

I might be switching to lj soon, it seems better (:

I'm gonna miss people here , but Thailand'd be a good trip (: I hope the team would bond together more ! Bye blog , shall post about two weeks later , after school ends . I shall have loads to post , cos of the YOG countdown also (:

2009-08-02T16:39:00.002+08:00

I'm not quite ready for Thailand.

Vikki ! Thanks for the post (: i will keep praying too .

Loads and loads of things to say, but anyway. Sigh.

FOP ! i cant go :(

But tomorrow going back to tk , thats something to look forward to (:
Gonna see that old man again (:

And of course, thailand (:

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2009-08-02T11:27:00.005+08:00

Thailand in 2 days (:

Updatee(:

Monday
nothing much ah, english compre , and history test. Oh, and maths test. It was HARDD. Think i fail already.

Tuesday
Mr ho told us he's not gonna be in school when we come back from thailand, cos he go army . Slack in com lab!

Wednesday
Scienceeee! Cow heart was damn gross , shall upload pictures next time. Adam still go and touch the whole thing till it looked like he molesting it. Eww.
CHINESE! I left like the ci yu part blank !

Cf was fun(: I thought nat's way of sharing was pretty cool, cos it includes everyone in , so theres a two-way communication. Although not many people were enthu:(

Thursday
Got chinese result back (: not bad ah , at least never fail. :D Night-time was awesome (: haha. Sang like mad with vikki and olivia, vikki playing the guitar. It brought back memories of how we would sing friendship songs during assembly, lead by Ms Kwek (: Those times were great man ! I love the song My life, your song (:

Friday
Geog test , never study at all :P Was supposed to cut-up the cow heart , but it was frozen , so postponed to next module. Geog was quite hard , hope results will be as good as last module (:

Yesterday!
Went for AT , then chao-ed to United square and Velo city to shop around. When i saw The Body Shop it reminded of SOMEONE who brought me into Body Shop once and spoiled my nose :P almost sniffed the whole shop that time :D

Ate ice-cream at a shop called UDDERS , near United square. The mango and strawberry was awesome !:D

(:(:(:(:(:

2009-08-01T13:31:00.002+08:00

Thailand in 3 days (:

Shall update when i have the time , going out soon.
i'm no longer confused (:

2009-07-26T14:27:00.000+08:00

This song ! The song we sang during pri school (:

That's what friends are for - Dionne Warwick

And I never thought I'd feel this way
And as far as I'm concerned
I'm glad I got the chance to say
That I do believe I love you

And if I should ever go away
Well, then close your eyes and try to feel
The way we do today
And then if you can remember

Keep smilin', keep shinin'
Knowin' you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for

Well, you came and opened me
And now there's so much more I see
And so by the way I thank you

Whoa, and then for the times when we're apart
Well, then close your eyes and know
These words are comin' from my heart
And then if you can remember, oh

Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
In good times, in bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
Oh, that's what friends are for

Whoa... oh... oh... keep smilin', keep shinin'
Knowin' you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for

Keep smilin', keep shinin'
Knowin' you can always count on me, oh, for sure
'Cause I tell you that's what friends are for
For good times and for bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for (That's what friends are for)

On me, for sure
That's what friends are for
Keep smilin', keep shinin'

2009-07-26T11:33:00.002+08:00

A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace


Theres too much going on , but i'm glad God has always been there, as the 'forever' friend :)
I think i should try and go for cg :) 

Stress !

2009-07-25T23:07:00.002+08:00

This week was...rather awesome :)

Module tests coming up , studying like mad here. CHINESE! Cannot do badly again! Zzz.

I love my team:) Yet don't get them at the same time . haha!

2009-07-19T12:48:00.005+08:00

Pesta sukan was great(:
We won Raffles Barricade(sec1s plus some sec 2s) twice:D 18-6(:
Lost to the other raffles team twice too.
But i thought we played well generally.
Good job guys!
Sunburnt on the shoulders! Ouchie.

Watched Harry potter and the Half-blood prince yesterday(:
Wasnt as nice as i thought it would be.
All the nice parts in the book wasnt acted out ):
Never show more about harry and ginny, quidditch and dumbedore's funeral!
Also never show the part where harry told ginny he had to break up with her.
Lols(:

Crap, mod tests are coming, super scared for chinese.
i barely pass it for the last few mods.
Gotta start studying already!
Boo.

Yay, thailand in two more weeks(:
it's confusing me, i dont know ,

2009-07-12T17:05:00.002+08:00

i dont get this feeling.
Ting got a message that on this day, God wants her to know...

... that when the sun rises, it rises for you.

Yes, for you. Just for you. Only for you. You are it, everything, the whole universe with all the billion galaxies and stars. The separateness you feel is only a mask you have put on to enjoy this human form. Under the mask, your shape is All. How far can you now feel your Self expand? To your parent?... to your child?... to your friend?... to a stranger on a street?... half way around the globe?

Your natural charisma and charm makes you an influential figure able to inspire confidence in others. Material abundance and emotional contentment are seemingly drawn to you and satisfy your dreams of success. However being humanitarian you find that applying your talents and creative prowess to a worthwhile purpose is far more satisfying than material gain. Your courage, adaptability and determination overcome any obstacles.

eh, cool(:
going back school later, yay(:
i wonder what's for cf this week.
Last week i got a card, which currently is in school(:
Thanks ben for explaining to me baptising and the old and new testament:D

2009-07-11T23:21:00.001+08:00

I dont like saturday lessons.
My left leg's pain.
Cos right leg injured the all slam left-.-
Heng not alot(:
Yay finished quite abit of work. Bye blog(:

2009-07-10T22:53:00.002+08:00

You left a hole in my heart.
This week was okayy,
getting stressed up with work.
How i wish the project's are gonna be done soon!
And, i dont wanna go for class.
Ankle injured,
And i want to finish my work.
And i still havent written my chinese letter.
But good thing is, i finished some research(:
Yay(:

Geography results quite good, science too(:
Now for chinese.

2009-07-05T23:54:00.003+08:00

Sometimes i think i know, but i dont. Sometimes i think i got it, when i really havent.

VIKKI! i need your help in understanding the book! I really dont get some of it, seriously. all the worry and doubts and everything.

ye (love is pain) to all my brokenhearted-people (come again) one's old a flame,, scream my name
and i'm so sick of love songs,, ye i hate damn love song,, memento of ours,,

(Lies) It's raining late at night it brings you here I run at the end of memories
I could live fine without you, even if you beg it will come to no use
I drank the alcohol I couldn't drink, I even drank up the night that burned my heart
I hate it, a day without you is too long, I beg to finally forget about you (It's all lies)

Without you, I have no smiles/No tears well up
I don't want to live anymore

You're like a *It makes me mad I think I'm going insane at the thought of you
I want to see you, but they say I can't, it's all over, I'll be right there

(chorus)
i'm so sorry but i love you it's all lies/I didn't know, but now I do, I need you
i'm so sorry but i love you sharp words on a whim I didn't even know, I sent you off
i'm so sorry but i love you it's all lies i'm so sorry but i love you
i'm so sorry but i love you leave me and could you forget me slowly so I can hurt

That song I sang you that I put everything into
By myself, so that nobody else knows (Yeah, the words that I said were all lies)

Now I'm being left alone, the sight of me not knowing what to do

The crinkled note in my pocket, that told of seperation, that I have folded (hey, hey)
(Where are you,that habit of mine of calling you)
I want to change, I want to laugh it all off now

(Chorus)
i'm so sorry but i love you it's all lies/I didn't know, but now I do, I need you
i'm so sorry but i love you sharp words on a whim I didn't even know, I sent you off
i'm so sorry but i love you it's all lies i'm so sorry(sorry) but i love you more more
i'm so sorry but i love you leave me and could you forget me slowly so I can hurt

oh oh oh oh oh for everything to be a dream oh oh oh oh oh because I'm nothing more than this

I still can't forget you. Even if it takes forever, even until I die.
I wonder if that hurt I gave you has healed, I'm sorry because I didn't do anything for you

(chorus)
i'm so sorry but i love you it's all lies/I didn't know, but now I do, I need you
i'm so sorry but i love you sharp words on a whim I didn't even know, I sent you off
i'm so sorry but i love you it's all lies i'm so sorry its all lies but i love you
i'm so sorry but i love you leave me and could you forget me slowly so I can hurt

Lies.

2009-06-28T16:02:00.002+08:00

Yessar, back to school today night(: finally! It's gonna be a tiring week, matches on monday and wednesday night. Missing cf!): But its somebody's birthday(:

Happy birthday!

Hope you like your present:D

2009-06-25T21:28:00.003+08:00

i feel like i have loads to say, but i dont know what. i feel like i'm so dead, i want to leave this house.
i need a hug. yours(: i want to hide in your room, forever and ever(: I'm gonna say this in advance. Happy birthday<3

ily dear(:

2009-06-25T20:28:00.001+08:00

God wants me to know... that decision is only wishful thinking until you take that first irreversible step.

You can tell yourself that you have already decided, that nothing now can stop you, but if that step backwards is so much safer than step forwards, what will hold you true to your path when the going gets tough? Sometimes, the right thing to do is to take that first irreversible step, the one after which you cannot go back. And now, for you, is one of those times.

Thank you.i needed this.

2009-06-24T22:02:00.002+08:00

I should have started on everything way earlier.

Now i'm getting stressed cos i still have loads to do. And not being able to do the side-roll consistently is getting to me. But thats not the point. Some guy thinks he's damn cool and step only la. To think he's so different from the other guy who has the same name as him. Christ bearing. Attitude only.

okay i'm seriously being very dumb getting worked up by this kind of thing-.- stop stop STOP!

babe don't be too angry kays? cheer up(: sorry i cant help more than that. sorry.

2009-06-23T22:55:00.002+08:00

The key to happiness is to do the things you love with the people you love.(Night at the museum 2)

i'm so hopeless, i can't even set my mind to doing my work, to do what i am supposed to do. How can i go on to change myself and net to change others too? i have no right to tell others they are wrong when i am like that. I must change. I must set my mind to it.

2009-06-21T20:57:00.004+08:00

Laziness causes the downfall of many people.

nonono. i need to stop whatever i am doing now. i need to go and do what i am supposed to do. i need to find that self-discipline and that yearn for excellence in me back. i need to stop fantasizing and get back on my feet. i need to stop resting on my laurels. I feel so wrong, so outta myself. I feel as though i have changed, because of you. nonono, it shouldnt be. I need to focus again, cos i'm losing it. I need to clear my head, of everything except for things i gotta do. Help me Jesus, i need to find myself again.

2009-06-21T13:15:00.003+08:00

Ouch,

AT yesterday was crazy, advance class was all SLAMMING. Now my left leg's hurting, and my right hip's utterly bruised-.- And we had this wrist lock cum slam that totally killed everyone. I'm so lucky cos i feel fragile then people do it more gently. But it still hurts. During first class some good whitie called TOMI come and lock me like one kind, baby lock nikio everything come out-.-

Now, i havent forgotten you dear(:

ELIZABETH!(:

Thanks for all the times i had with you, no matter in your room or not(:
Thanks for listening to me talk rubbish always.
Thanks for making me smile, no matter what(:
Thanks for 250509(:
Thankd for the many many hugs i always get!
ILY TRUCKLOADS!<3!

2009-06-19T22:09:00.002+08:00

I miss people loads. Olivia! Azrael! Dinah! okay vikki dana and some of the team too although i just saw them today.But olivia and azrael's coming back tomorrow(: but az's gonna be quarantined for a week.-.-

I wanna go back school quick! But the ministry might be extending the school hols for a few more weeks cos of swine flu-.- I'm so gonna rot at home and fail my tests and fitness testing when i get back to school after school hols. Gotta start working on everything and improve (:

2009-06-19T16:05:00.002+08:00

'What will you do if the world ends tomorrow?'

Yesterday while stretching after gym liz asked this question, and it struck me that i would want to do loads of things. I would want to tell people my true heart-felt feelings, like thank you and all. (okay for those i dislike i wont tell them i dislike them cos it would spoil their last day). I would wanna travel all around the world(wait one day not enough) and spend time with the people i love:AZRAEL!(: vikki and olivia and some of those in the team and some others too. (: <3!

Live each day like there's no tomorrow.

I think it would really help me appreciate and enjoy my life more if i learn to do as the phrase says, for i would try and live my life to the fullest each and everyday. But i guess some things cant be helped, but i would try to live my life better each day(:

2009-06-19T15:48:00.002+08:00

Catch me before i fall.

The phrase is really cool right? It's actually the title of a book. The book's really sad, cos it writes about someone's life that was so horrid and lack of love and everything that is needed. Yeah, i guess now i finally realise i've been really idiotic over my life, cos there are many others with a much worse life than mine. I guess i just have to accept and learn how to face it.(:

OLIVIA! I'm gonna re-do yours cos its really short. This way vikki wont be so happy cos hers is longer:P

Thanks for always being there for me, no matter what happens.
Thanks for always trying to make me feel not-so-left-out although i can be irritating at times.
Thanks for bearing with me all these times when i am so freakishly irritating, esp. primary school.
Thanks for always making me smile, with that crazy retarded funny personality of yours.
Thanks for all your advice you gave me.
Thanks for that note you wrote me last year,which really was touching.
ILY OLIVIA BU!(: <3!

2009-06-17T18:13:00.003+08:00

Soul-searching!

I think my attitude is coming back again! Ohdear and its back cos of her, which in a minute i shall blast everything out. And my laziness is coming back too! Crap i really have to find my self-control back. i'm becoming too addicted to the computer and having fun!

You think its funny, all the jokes you've made. You think its cute, the way you say things, and treat people. You take me for granted, do you? You think i'm your dog, is it? You treat me like i have no options, no emotions. I'm not your robot to order around. And i will make my own choice someday, without YOU interfering, and god bless i would be truly happy then. And you would know that i have never felt truly happy with you. You think of no one but you only, and do things only thinking about yourself. Have you ever thought that you are dragging two others with you? I admit, i'm still too young to be released from your clutches fully, but don't i have a choice? I think you're the same as 'her', or even worse. And you think the way you say others perfectly nice names are funny, dont you. Mind you, its insulting. Selfish, uncaring creature. You're a disappointment.

*Hey seniors, don't think wrong. It isnt any of you. please don't be offended or something.

2009-06-16T16:50:00.003+08:00

Boo.

Mum's not allowing me to go for cf meeting! Oh crap i've been looking forward to it for long. Next time then(: But i reaaally wanna go! A barbeque! And i think there'll be games and some fun stuff, maybe sharing? Awww i'm missing so much! Nevermind, people who's going, have fun!(: (i bet vikki would:DDD)

2009-06-15T20:05:00.002+08:00

That person.

i'm seriously becoming a pig. I should go and run, but i didnt. OMG! fitness testing gonna drop la.

Okayy, next dedication(:

OLIVIA BU!(:

Ahaha, this girl uh, the crazy one that is always there for me(: all the things she do is damn funny la. Johnny johnny johnny johnny whoosh johnny whoosh!:DDD

Thanks for the note you wrote me last year(: <3! Thanks for all the advice!

2009-06-14T19:51:00.002+08:00

VIKKI!

Thanks for the letter you wrote to me last year.
Thanks for changing me.
Thanks for giving me a wake-up call.
Thanks for being there for me.
Thanks for all the advice you gave me.
Thanks for helping me get through life.
ILY vikki!(: <3

hope our plan would work(:

2009-06-12T22:18:00.002+08:00

I'm so glad something is finally done. I'm so glad that now people are standing up and speaking out loud, cos i'm sick of being the one to be picked on everytime, and i'm sick of always being hurt, and crying to myself.

I'm so glad now, for people notice my misery, and they want to stand up, to do something brave, and i'm thankful for that. Thank you glynis! I know it wouldnt be easy for you, but i'm willing to be there for you and help you face it. ily!

I've been bearing with you for long, and now i shall stand up to you! And now i shall not be alone, and i will not be knocked down by you, for the team will be behind me, and they will speak with me. Now you are the one who is truly alone, and only true change can help you. I do not care what 'charm' you have, or how many spare tyres you have at your disposal, but this time round you will not get out of this.

Team, i love all of you.Thanks vikki,dana,nadiah,glynis,aqilah,syafiqah and emily, cos you guys really rock and gave me the strength. <3(:

2009-06-10T21:23:00.002+08:00

Monday
game was alright, played GK GS GD(: I thought 1st quarter i played quite not bad luhhs, then 3rd quarter had this reaaally tall defender on me, and the GD also come guard me then i kena squashed like one kind. Couldnt move at all. Until VIKKI came to the rescue and shot a couple of far shots that went chop chop then the GD get off me(:

I thought that quarter was quite okay, 7 attempts and 3 shots(i totally missed the first 4, rim also never hit). Last quarter i played with the very rough shooter, got one she bang into me she fall and give me the not happy face-.- After that she angry with me, bang me alot of times. I thought the whole team played great, although noraida said we werent that good. I love the part where Liz was playing C! So many beautiful interceptions! And Vikki! Wonderful shots at the end. And the offers were not bad, nobody had too big a problem finding people to pass too. Only the accuracy of the pass needs to be worked on.

2009-06-08T15:18:00.002+08:00

Got a match laterr, and we're two man(or should i say two girls) down, cos olivia and sarah's overseas.

Geez, i really have to play well later. Gotta focus and press on. I think its my stamina thats bringing me down. Have to work on it. Play well later! FOCUS!

2009-06-07T16:56:00.002+08:00

Sign.

I reaaally hope i'll play well for the next match. Things havent been going too well. I need to go and do my hw! Anyone give me an idea how to write a story with the title'change myself'? i gotta write it in chinese and in 600-700 words!

I need someone to crap everything out! Ohwell but everyones not doing too good either. I wanna go out but theres training everyday and AT and stuff going on...haiz. i miss school!): wanna go back fast.

2009-06-07T13:51:00.004+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OLIVIA!<3

AT yesterday was awesomeness! All the SP colour belts werent there so it wasnt that fun, but the juniors were quite okay as well. First training was really slack, cos got alot of newbies so Sensei did alot of basics.

Weapon training was the best! Trained with the bokken(wooden sword). The front-back shuffle plus slashing of the sword was really tiring! Then did this drill with Tomi that had us slashing at each other-awesome! Did a couple more drills and then had this one where we ended up poking people in the stomach. Ouch! someone beside me kena knuckled in the side and hopped around the dojo(training place). Lol. Alrights, byeee blog!

2009-06-05T15:09:00.002+08:00

Cant believe it.

Alrights, i'm so bored!
Another song! i love this one manzz(:

Breathless

If our love was a fairy tale
I would charge in and rescue you
On a yacht baby we would sail
To an island where we’d say I do

And if we had babies they would look like you
It’d be so beautiful if that came true
You don’t even know how very special you are

Chorus

You leave me breathless
You’re everything good in my life
You leave me breathless
I still can’t believe that you’re mine
You just walked out of one of my dreams
So beautiful you’re leaving me
Breathless

And if our love was a story book
We would meet on the very first page
The last chapter would be about
How I’m thankful for the life we’ve made

And if we had babies they would have your eyes
I would fall deeper watching you give life
You don’t even know how very special you are

You leave me breathless
You’re everything good in my life
You leave me breathless
I still can’t believe that you’re mine
You just walked out of one of my dreams
So beautiful you’re leaving me

You must have been sent from heaven to earth to change me
You’re like an angel
The thing that I feel is stronger than love believe me
You’re something special
I only hope that I’ll one day deserve what you’ve given me
But all I can do is try
Every day of my life

You leave me breathless
You’re everything good in my life
You leave me breathless
I still can’t believe that you’re mine
You just walked out of one of my dreams
So beautiful you’re leaving me
Breathless

You leave me breathless
You’re everything good in my life
You leave me breathless
I still can’t believe that you’re mine
You just walked out of one of my dreams
So beautiful you’re leaving me
Breathless


how i wish it was true.

2009-06-03T23:16:00.002+08:00

Quick feet.
Better stamina.
Faster reaction.
Tighter defence.
Better positioning.
Higher elevation.
Wide view.
FOCUS.

2009-06-03T21:52:00.005+08:00

alright.

quite a crappy two weeks luhh, worse then usual. but ohwell, some people made it up, so(:

last week
Monday
yeah, still thinking. but i'm so glad olivia told me what i should do. at least i have an idea(: ily olivia and elizabeth and vikki who tried to help me!<3

Tuesday
woah the english holiday hw like alot only! 200++ spelling words plus dunno what else more!

Wednesday and Thursday
The chinese paper 2 damn hard la! like although i didnt leave as many balnks as last time still got lor! but i tried my best(: no cf this week cos must pack stuff! ):

Friday
lugged everything back home, arms almost break la! But th best thing is, i pass my chinese! yessar! finally la, somemore pass quite okay(: went for chalet! had a swim with my aunt at the pool. Was fun luhh, only she swim quite slow(no offence:P) then i slack. I saw this damn gross thing at the pool. got like 1 teenage couple messing around with each other in th pool lor, damn gross. We swam too long, when we reach back the bbq only left chicken wings=.= end up for dinner i ate like 8 chicken wings.

Saturday
woke up, went swimming again! now with aunt and two cousins(: then we take turn with the goggles and go see the hole at the bottom of the swimming pool where you can go see people downstairs:P then got 1 time got one angmoh stare at us we zhao damn fast.

After that me and my cousins went to walk around at ehub, then i saw someone that look like yuan min! Omg i really thought her sia, look damn alike i swear.

BBq-ed again! finally got to eat my crabsticks(: cop-ed like 6 or 7 then the rest give cousins. swimming!(yet again) This time with four cousins! This one was the best luhhh. We swam loads and joked around like nobodys business(: Ahhh! my dearest cousin jiaxin was damn funny la! cos she very heavy then me and another cousin go climb on her make her walk all around the swimming pool jumping like frog! Then we had this competition between us see who can hold breath swim the furthest. Eh, i never go knock my teeth again okay, this time although th pool only 1.2m i go wear goggles de hor. ended up second:P

THIS week
Monday
match! seriously, i played HORRIBLE. Kena thrashed 17-50. knew i played damn bad le someone still say so much, crap.

Tuesday & Wednesday
gym and courtwork. Courtwork killer!!! all the jumping and running almost killed my legs. i wanna go cf! unfortunately the next one will be after th hols): AT was damn slack, but quite fun uhh. havent seen christopher for damn long uhh, he and his new friend like action only. Then when we doing weapons training imran's jo broke into half! Omg damn funny! heart pain la he 20++ dollars for one lor. Sandy took us for training, dunno why sensei didnt but yeah. And for like 2 techniques had to do with this small kid of 4=.= damn hard to do tenchi nage(idk if i spell correctly) with a small kid yknow.

2009-05-25T11:46:00.001+08:00

in the com lab now, listening to mrs gan saying the corrections for test. eee, i like this bible verse from the test: Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;do not fret-it leads only to evil. theres one more but its too long.

thanks olivia, for advicing me yesterday night.<3

2009-05-24T13:26:00.007+08:00

Superhuman
Weak
I had been crying and crying for weeks
How'd I survive when I could barely speak?
Barely eat, on my knees

But that's the moment you came to me
I don't know what your love has done to me
Think I'm invincible
I see through the me I used to be

You changed my whole life
Don't know what you're doing
To me with your love

I'm feeling all superhuman you did this to me
A superhuman heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

Superhuman
I feel so superhuman
Superhuman
I feel so superhuman
Superhuman

Strong
Since I been flying and righting the wrongs
Feels almost like I had it all along
I can see tomorrow

Where every problem is gone because
I flew everywhere with love inside of me
It's unbelievable to see
How love can set me free

You changed my whole life
Don't know what you're doing
To me with your love

I'm feeling all superhuman you did this to me
A superhuman heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

Superhuman
I feel so superhuman
Superhuman
I feel so superhuman

It's not a bird, not a plane
It's my heart and it?s going gone away
My only weakness is you, only reason is you
Every minute with you I feel like I can do anything
Going, going I'm gone away! Love!

You changed my whole life
Don't know what you're doing
To me with your love

I'm feeling all superhuman you did this to me
A superhuman heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

Superhuman
Superhuman

going to grandma house later to pick up my homework, before going school. damn bored now, want to go back school. still have a lot of things in school i need to bring back home! i wonder how am i gonna lug everything back on friday.

major decision.
why make my life so crappy,
why make me so upset.
i have 2 paths to choose,
why make me choose 1 of them?
i just want to be happy.
why make it so hard?
to think,
i might leave you someday.
you never knew how i felt,
and how i cried over it.
and i dont ever want to go home anymore.

2009-05-23T20:57:00.004+08:00

updateeees.

Monday
Lunch was disgusting. Was eating halfway then suddenly people around were like 'eh, got headless bird there leh.' didnt know where was it at first, until dana beside me was like 'Omg there's a headless bird beside me!' I saw it, it was damn gross, and the head had blood on it. Ewww. think it flew too close to the ceiling fan then kena. Couldnt eat after that.

Went for first National league game, drew 24 all. And while waiting for the U14's the finish their match before our match we went to kallang leisure park! mdm lee treated us a desert each;thanks mdm lee! almost couldnt make it in time back for warmup.

Tuesday & Wednesday
Nothing much, cf was awesome. Gerry shared about loving people you dont really like and trying to build a relationship with that person. Even if the person shoots you back and wouldnt take your advice to heart, we should try again, and keep trying. Take a step back if the person really doesnt listen, and try again. I think its really useful, cos i've been getting very angry due to people who has a big attitude problem and thinks they are the biggest. i mean, wth? nobody's the best in the world, so why treat everyone like your slave? So immature, i think, and to shoot people like crazy? so childish and dumb, cos you just missed a chance to become a better person.

Thursday,Friday & Saturday

just getting tired and stuff. loads of stuff going on, gotta study harder and bring my results up. Ran 2.4 for warmup! tired lor, somemore under hot sun.

went to help for trials, damn bored. Me and olivia chen took one group, but then most of the time they stare at other groups not interested in what we explaining lor. Until olivia and me also sian. tomorrow going lesson!!! i dont wanna go but mum still forcing me go cos i missed today's. boo.

Sports Leaders 2008-09!

i miss all of the memories we had, all the organization of camps and sports day.
i miss all the happenings at pulau ubin.
i miss all the messing about in the leaders room.
i miss all the punishment we had together.
i miss all the joking we had together.
i miss all the craziness.
i miss all the hard times we had.
i miss all the encouraging of one another.

Saw the paka photos sarah uploaded on facebook, and kinda got sad that i didnt go for that one last time we would be all together. What could i do when my mum only allowed me to go for one overseas trip? i wanted to go real bad, but i knew my njoo would flip if i chose not to go for cross straits. ohwell. now we could never be together once again, cos dongyoon's in korea. and many of us just hadnt got the time to meet up and stuff.

Loveees-EXCO!

secretary;vikki(:
assistant secretary;sarah min!
treasurer;meihua(:
cameraman;zhengming!
videogirl;peier!

damn you, cant you just let me have my own life? it isnt funny you know, i cant stand it anymore. i know its difficult for you too, but cant you just let me be? am i not old enough to be trusted?

2009-05-17T14:59:00.007+08:00

Haiz.

crap. now everytime i wanna use the computer not for homework, i'll have to pay my aunt two bucks per hour cos she says later com spoil then she pay unfair. gosh i bolui already plus wanna use computer also must pay i'm so DEAD. Been doing some work, but seems like my homework and things that i need to study is endless. major module tests all coming up, maths mid-year too. chinese! heng laoshi gave us shortened list of what we need to study if not i'm so gonna die and fail my mm test. thank you laoshi! i must go and study hard for my tests, and live up to not only other's expectations but MINE!

Copied from vikki's blog(:

(A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle)
Girl: Slow down. Im scared.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not. Please, its too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.

(Girl hugs him)
Guy: Can u take my helmet off and put it on? Its bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only one survived.

The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him, felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it
meant he would die.

true love means you're willing to give it all for a person, even if it means your life, just to keep them safe

i think its really meaningful, cos it shows that love is unconditional, and that when love is unconditional it doesnt matter if its losing your own life. Only saving the other person or making him/her happy would matter to you.(:

2009-05-15T20:39:00.008+08:00

My future decided

You hold the future in your hands
You know my dreams and you have a plan
And as you light my way, I'll follow you

My eyes on all of the above
My soul secure in all you've done
My minds made up
And you are the only one for me

Jesus, savior, in my life you are everything
My future decided, I will praise your name
And I know that I am, I am yours
Yeah, I know that I am, I am yours

You hold the earth in your command
You are the rock on which I stand
And as I live each day, I'll follow you

My eyes on all of the above
My soul secure in all you've done
My minds made up
And you are the only one for me

Jesus, savior, in my life you are everything
My future decided, I will praise your name
And I know that I am, I am yours
Yeah, I know that I am, I am yours

Aren't afraid, aren't ashamed Lord we know who we are
We are your people and we won't be silent
Unified hear us cry at the top of our lungs
You our God and we will not be shaken

Aren't afraid, aren't ashamed Lord we know who we are
We are your people and we won't be silent
Unified hear us cry at the top of our lungs
You our God and we will not be shaken

Jesus, savior, in my life you are everything
My future decided, I will praise your name
And I know that I am, I am yours
Yeah, I know that I am, I am yours

Thursday
nothing much happened, went to gym, damn tired.Had this talk by Dr Seet about bgr, thats all. I think he gets the message across to us more clearly than any other teacher or adult and we would understand it easily and know exactly what he is trying to say. And he puts it in a way that would appeal to all of us teens at this age by using something almost everyone loves: CHOCOLATES. i mean, who would have thought of using chocolates to explain about bgr? it was really smart of him to think of that. (:

Friday
Ran 2.4 in the morning, improved almost 1 min; got 14mins. Not bad, starting to improve, but need more practice to improve more. Gonna aim for 13mins next. Afternoon had training with the seniors minus those that were training with the reds. Noraida ended training like real late at 7.05, and chiong-ed like one kind to bathe and check-out.

To you:
i hope you read this. i'm sorry babe, sorry for misunderstanding you that night, for what i wrote especially, and also for jumping to conclusions. ignore what i wrote that time, cos it's wrong, what i thought it was about. i know that i wouldnt be able to feel what you're feeling now. i'm sorry that i can't help you in any way, and that i cannot share the pain with you. But i'll always be there for you if you need someone to be there, and if you dont want me to talk about it i wont. i'm sorry. <3>

2009-05-14T15:36:00.005+08:00

olivia and me

vikki pouring tea!

vik and me

In school now, using dee's laptop.

Monday
did spelling test, finally got full marks! didnt have afternoon training cos noraida fell sick, so slacked till time to go dinner.

Tuesday
Had maths quiz, still quite confused about the angle thingys and what to write for reasons(i really have no idea). Slept in in the morning cos noraida was still sick, and gym-ed in the afternoon. The dumbell thing damn tiring! only 3kg already dying.

Wednesday
had self-training with seniors in the morning,then after lunch went off for learning journey at chinatown. went to this place called the "yuan mao guan"(i forgot what is it in english). Damn boring lor the place. Went to explore the streets cos we were early, and bought a bear(: Went to the teahouse next, and did this thing that supposingly make you destress. Had fun making the tea! Took a few pictures with olivia and vikki(:The rice dumpling and tea eggs were damn nice! There was this ice cream puff thingy that glynis bought and shared that was awesome:DDD

Cf was great, played this screaming game that had Raphael screaming like some crazyy idiot. And the chips meet boy part was really funny.

ok, gtg for gym now, blog again on friday.

2009-05-09T19:37:00.007+08:00

Hosanna

I see the king of glory
Coming on the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes
The whole earth shakes

I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing
The people sing

[Chorus]
Hosanna
Hosanna
Hosanna in the highest x2

I see a generation
Rising up to take their place
With selfless faith
With selfless faith

I see a near revival
Stirring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees
We're on our knees

[Chorus]

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me

Break my heart from what breaks yours
Everything I am for your kingdoms cause
As I go from earth to
Eternity

[Chorus] x2

Hosanna in the highest

I'm so in love with this song after the cf band played it(: It's reaaaally nice.

Didnt do much today, just slacked around and use the com. Did some chores around
the house and had my uncle test me spelling( its kinda lame i know, but i had to
study cos my results are horrible) and still had some wrong.

Nat or vikki! May i know if there's anything i can do for cf? i feel bad cos vikki's
doing almost everything and i'm not even doing anything.i wanna help.

I'm still thinking about stuff, like all those vikki made me think about when i
chatted with her. I have to change, and i have to think of how to.
I realised that all that she brought up was true, and was caused by me, not the
people around me. It's what i do that made them do what they did.
Vikki, thanks for all that.(: Please continue helping me change for the better, and
tell me when i'm not doing things right. ily vikki!<3(:

Day out!

2009-05-08T18:22:00.008+08:00

Yay! My mum finally allowed me to have a day out! Met vikki, chris and ben at newton mrt station at 9 to go to chris house for cf band practice(i went to watch only). Scott came later His house is damn cool! There's like a music room and an WINE CELLAR .

Played chinese chess with elizabeth and got thrashed real badly. Then the band took a break and came over to look at us playing. I played another round with scott and lost again, but not so badly this time(: Elizabeth played with chris and lost a lot of important pieces, and ended up the loser.
Meanwhile, ben and vikki sat nearby with no idea what on earth we were talking about. Vikki didnt even know it was chinese characters on the chess pieces:P

Zhao-ed at 12++, then went plaza sing with vikki to meet liz to watch movie. watched Star Track. i thought it was quite nice, although liz said it was boring. mrt-ed back to grandma house, yeah.(:

Finally my blog was done, after some good person killed himself trying to fix it for two hours. Thanks alot greg!(:

Should i try out as vocalist? i have no idea.

2009-05-02T15:09:00.013+08:00

Back from camp...campfire is the best man. Love my group! Group 8 all the way!
We won the best campfire performance, which i think was great(: shall not continue already, its too long.

CF is coming along quite nicely, only that the upper sec has to extend sst to 9.30pm instead. the lower sec are gonna be helping out with the whole thing, like preparing songs and slides and so on. yeah...thats all i have to post.

2008-12-11T13:47:00.002+08:00

Hello! i made a blog for myself but i dont know how to change blogskin and get a tagboard. anyone help me?